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Los cinco compañeros de Martin, incluido él, como querían terminar
con la despedida de soltero a lo grande, después de una prolongada fiesta con todos los
ingredientes que necesitaban, después de un día de opíparas comidas y con más
botellas, cubos de alcohol, y barrabasadas sin fin, decidieron acercarse a un viejo club de
putas, que tampoco eran jóvenes, para allí acabar con aquella despedida, que querían pasarse a la historia, más bien a la historia de sus jóvenes vidas.
Como ninguno de ellos sobrepasaba los 25 años consideraban que todo lo que hiciesen seria poco.
Se fueron a este club de putas ya maduras, fue porque ellos sabían que en los que eran más jóvenes, no aceptaban nos, más bien extraño.
Las mujeres que allí encontraron todas eran mayores de 40 años.
Era de suponer que estos debían atender a pensionistas que
el gobierno de la nación, los había condenado casi a
la indigencia, olvidando que a estos, también se les ponía dura y que de cuando en cuando les apetecería, tocar
algún culo, aunque este tuviese 50 años. Estaba claro, que los culos de sus mujeres,
tenían más de 20 años, que los del club. Y encima, algunos ya no estaban para saltos de armario.
La que no tenia artrosis, había perdido el vello de su chocho,
como también los había que querían que se las tirase algún joven que después de terminar volviese a empezar;
y esto, aquellos pensionistas ya no lo lograban.
Cuando entraron en el local, que olía a perfume de bajo precio comprado
en las tiendas chinas, solamente quedaban 2 clientes tomando una consumición en el mostrador.
Casi era la hora de cerrar. El que llevaba más litros
ingeridos de agua de fuego, – como decían los indios
americanos en las películas y refiriéndose al
whisky – acercose a la dueña del prostíbulo que estaba al final de la barra para
preguntarle cuanto les cobraría por cerrar la puerta del club, quedándose
ellos solos con sus pupilas hasta que se cansasen. La dueña que ya arrastraba sus 60 años con más penas que glorias, le dijo que
aquello les iba a costar 2.500€.- Ella sabía que ni con una
semana lo sacarían. Como los 2 clientes que allí había no llevaban idea de marcharse les ofreció no cobrarles si se iban.
Ya con la puerta cerrada, y las luces exteriores también poniendo la música de maquina a todo volumen empezaron a
bailar con aquellas señoras que ejercían el oficio más antiguo de la humanidad y que tal como se iba
calentando el ambiente e igual que sus clientes acabaron bailando desnudas.
Incluso la muy veterana dueña se añadió a la fiesta.
La pobre, a la que ya se le caían los pechos como
si fueran peonzas, mantenía en buena conservación un culo como los que pintaron los clásicos hacia varios
siglos. Ella fue la que primero recibió en este la primera
estocada de la noche. Después, sus pupilas hicieron lo mismo.
Cuando ya llevaban vaciadas más de media docena de botellas de champan, al más aguerrido de
aquellos clientes. Se le ocurrió la parida de la noche, eso
sí, que la actora de aquella escena se dejase fotografiar con el whatsapp,
aún que fuese de espaldas. La elegida aceptó encantada; nunca….
Nunca en su vida, tuvo una petición como aquella.
Todo y que había conocido a lo más florido de la especie humana.
Esta, en la única mesa que había en el club,
y ayudándola a subir en ella, para que no volcase la pobrecita, cumplió admirablemente con la petición de
aquel cliente, aunque eso sí, le costó un poco. Agachándose y en cuclillas encima de la mesa tanta fuerza, hizo que se le escapó un pedo más que memorable de raros olores,
para después soltar la gran cagada. Por detrás, el cliente de la petición pudo hacer varias fotos para la posteridad.
Todos los que allí pudieron observar aquella obra maestra,… todos,
aplaudieron a rabiar. Quizá de haber estado allí el gran Dalí, hubiese podido pintar un lienzo posiblemente de incalculable valor, por ser
más bien único. Una de las colegas de aquella, cargada de champan y más contenta que un ocho,
como tenía necesidad, de hacerlo, se ofreció a
repetir la escena. Para que todo quedase bien en las próximas fotos, entre dos
sacaron la mesa por la puerta trasera en donde había una manguera con agua a presión y la lavaron.
Después, se repitió la esplendida escena. Subieron a la chica a la que la vejiga ya
la apretaba fuertemente esta casi no tuvo tiempo de agacharse, se le escapó como
un torrente toda la carga, tanto… que salpicó al fotógrafo de turno que
tenia detrás cámara en mano. – el olor que deprendió tan fuerte era que al
perfume de los chinos con que limpiaban el local, lo barrió como
un vendaval.
Esta vez, además de la manguera tuvieron que recurrir a la
fregona para recoger lo del suelo. Después en donde tiraban un litro de aquel liquido perfumado chino, tuvieron que tirar 3 botellas de 1 litro.
Pasados más de 10 años de aquella noche con despedida de soltero
a la que siguió la boda y posterior – mucho tiempo después – divorcio.
En el imaginario público, aun perduraba la célebre noche de las grandes cagadas.
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Warning: count(): Parameter must be an array or an object that implements Countable in /home/randg-inc3/marushinkogyo.com/public_html/wp-content/themes/amore_tcd028/comments.php on line 57
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climate is cozy as well as your staff are moist as well as
pleased. https://johnwickchapter3.org/download/
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Los cinco compañeros de Martin, incluido él, como querían terminar
con la despedida de soltero a lo grande, después de una prolongada fiesta con todos los
ingredientes que necesitaban, después de un día de opíparas comidas y con más
botellas, cubos de alcohol, y barrabasadas sin fin, decidieron acercarse a un viejo club de
putas, que tampoco eran jóvenes, para allí acabar con aquella despedida, que querían pasarse a la historia, más bien a la historia de sus jóvenes vidas.
Como ninguno de ellos sobrepasaba los 25 años consideraban que todo lo que hiciesen seria poco.
Se fueron a este club de putas ya maduras, fue porque ellos sabían que en los que eran más jóvenes, no aceptaban nos, más bien extraño.
Las mujeres que allí encontraron todas eran mayores de 40 años.
Era de suponer que estos debían atender a pensionistas que
el gobierno de la nación, los había condenado casi a
la indigencia, olvidando que a estos, también se les ponía dura y que de cuando en cuando les apetecería, tocar
algún culo, aunque este tuviese 50 años. Estaba claro, que los culos de sus mujeres,
tenían más de 20 años, que los del club. Y encima, algunos ya no estaban para saltos de armario.
La que no tenia artrosis, había perdido el vello de su chocho,
como también los había que querían que se las tirase algún joven que después de terminar volviese a empezar;
y esto, aquellos pensionistas ya no lo lograban.
Cuando entraron en el local, que olía a perfume de bajo precio comprado
en las tiendas chinas, solamente quedaban 2 clientes tomando una consumición en el mostrador.
Casi era la hora de cerrar. El que llevaba más litros
ingeridos de agua de fuego, – como decían los indios
americanos en las películas y refiriéndose al
whisky – acercose a la dueña del prostíbulo que estaba al final de la barra para
preguntarle cuanto les cobraría por cerrar la puerta del club, quedándose
ellos solos con sus pupilas hasta que se cansasen. La dueña que ya arrastraba sus 60 años con más penas que glorias, le dijo que
aquello les iba a costar 2.500€.- Ella sabía que ni con una
semana lo sacarían. Como los 2 clientes que allí había no llevaban idea de marcharse les ofreció no cobrarles si se iban.
Ya con la puerta cerrada, y las luces exteriores también poniendo la música de maquina a todo volumen empezaron a
bailar con aquellas señoras que ejercían el oficio más antiguo de la humanidad y que tal como se iba
calentando el ambiente e igual que sus clientes acabaron bailando desnudas.
Incluso la muy veterana dueña se añadió a la fiesta.
La pobre, a la que ya se le caían los pechos como
si fueran peonzas, mantenía en buena conservación un culo como los que pintaron los clásicos hacia varios
siglos. Ella fue la que primero recibió en este la primera
estocada de la noche. Después, sus pupilas hicieron lo mismo.
Cuando ya llevaban vaciadas más de media docena de botellas de champan, al más aguerrido de
aquellos clientes. Se le ocurrió la parida de la noche, eso
sí, que la actora de aquella escena se dejase fotografiar con el whatsapp,
aún que fuese de espaldas. La elegida aceptó encantada; nunca….
Nunca en su vida, tuvo una petición como aquella.
Todo y que había conocido a lo más florido de la especie humana.
Esta, en la única mesa que había en el club,
y ayudándola a subir en ella, para que no volcase la pobrecita, cumplió admirablemente con la petición de
aquel cliente, aunque eso sí, le costó un poco. Agachándose y en cuclillas encima de la mesa tanta fuerza, hizo que se le escapó un pedo más que memorable de raros olores,
para después soltar la gran cagada. Por detrás, el cliente de la petición pudo hacer varias fotos para la posteridad.
Todos los que allí pudieron observar aquella obra maestra,… todos,
aplaudieron a rabiar. Quizá de haber estado allí el gran Dalí, hubiese podido pintar un lienzo posiblemente de incalculable valor, por ser
más bien único. Una de las colegas de aquella, cargada de champan y más contenta que un ocho,
como tenía necesidad, de hacerlo, se ofreció a
repetir la escena. Para que todo quedase bien en las próximas fotos, entre dos
sacaron la mesa por la puerta trasera en donde había una manguera con agua a presión y la lavaron.
Después, se repitió la esplendida escena. Subieron a la chica a la que la vejiga ya
la apretaba fuertemente esta casi no tuvo tiempo de agacharse, se le escapó como
un torrente toda la carga, tanto… que salpicó al fotógrafo de turno que
tenia detrás cámara en mano. – el olor que deprendió tan fuerte era que al
perfume de los chinos con que limpiaban el local, lo barrió como
un vendaval.
Esta vez, además de la manguera tuvieron que recurrir a la
fregona para recoger lo del suelo. Después en donde tiraban un litro de aquel liquido perfumado chino, tuvieron que tirar 3 botellas de 1 litro.
Pasados más de 10 años de aquella noche con despedida de soltero
a la que siguió la boda y posterior – mucho tiempo después – divorcio.
En el imaginario público, aun perduraba la célebre noche de las grandes cagadas.
Wow that was strange. I just wrote an very long comment but after I
clicked submit my comment didn’t show up. Grrrr… well I’m not writing
all that over again. Anyways, just wanted to say wonderful blog!